From self-care gifts to tales of fond friendships, this month we’ve made it our mission to celebrate every kind of beautiful bond. But, for those of you not yet in the Valentine’s spirit, we have a special little something to warm your heart.
Terry and Grace Crow have become revered figures at Anthropologie head office. Married for over 60 years and grandparents to our senior social media executive Paige Anthony, we’re often regaled with stories of their lives together.
From Grace’s super-nan ability to carry four children’s scooters at once, to Terry’s preference for only wearing one sock brand (and colour), we hear about the rosiest moments. But with 60 years of marriage comes its ups and downs, trials and tribulations.
To their family, they share an unbreakable bond, something money woes, job changes and family life couldn’t dampen. So, what could they teach Paige about modern day love? She sat down with them to find out.
Lessons in Love
Anthro staffer Paige A. speaks to her grandparents about 60 years of love.
Interview by Paige Anthony, edited by Harriett Monaghan
Paige (P): So, nan and grandad, how did you meet?
Grace (G): Well, we first met at work, didn’t we Terry.
Terry (T): We worked in a dressmaker’s factory – Blaine’s in Middlesex Street, London. Grace was on one floor working as a machinist and I worked on the basement as a cutter. We got to know each other by getting the same train after work each day and it just sort of developed from there.
P: What are some of your earliest memories together?
T: We courted for about two years then got married.
G: No, we got engaged. He didn’t ask permission from my father. Things were beginning to move on then – a little less strict though if you had children but weren’t married, it was a real taboo. It would be the talk of the road and often people were sent away.
I used to go to caravan holidays with my dad and my sister and then one day, Terry took us to the coach and my dad said why doesn’t he come down and stay with us? He didn’t stay in the caravan with us but that’s how it started. The rest as they say is history.
P: If you had to describe each other in three words, what would they be?
T: Bloody awful (laughs).
G: I already said you’re ‘a bloody nuisance’ (laughs). That’s three words, right? No, honestly, he’s very generous. He was tight with his money when he was younger but he’s reformed now.
T: My three words would be, ‘we’ve had our moments.’
G: That can’t be about me… and it’s more than three words…
Grace (G): Well, we first met at work, didn’t we Terry.
Terry (T): We worked in a dressmaker’s factory – Blaine’s in Middlesex Street, London. Grace was on one floor working as a machinist and I worked on the basement as a cutter. We got to know each other by getting the same train after work each day and it just sort of developed from there.
P: What are some of your earliest memories together?
T: We courted for about two years then got married.
G: No, we got engaged. He didn’t ask permission from my father. Things were beginning to move on then – a little less strict though if you had children but weren’t married, it was a real taboo. It would be the talk of the road and often people were sent away.
I used to go to caravan holidays with my dad and my sister and then one day, Terry took us to the coach and my dad said why doesn’t he come down and stay with us? He didn’t stay in the caravan with us but that’s how it started. The rest as they say is history.
P: If you had to describe each other in three words, what would they be?
T: Bloody awful (laughs).
G: I already said you’re ‘a bloody nuisance’ (laughs). That’s three words, right? No, honestly, he’s very generous. He was tight with his money when he was younger but he’s reformed now.
T: My three words would be, ‘we’ve had our moments.’
G: That can’t be about me… and it’s more than three words…
P: Grandad, what are your favourite things about Nanny?
T: There are lots of things I like about her. We’ve had our ups and downs like all families do but we’ve done the best we could with what we had. Back in the day, money was a lot tighter and Grace was good at being clever – making clothes for the kids. That’s something I really admire.
P: Nan, how about your favourite things about Grandad?
G: If we wanted to buy something back then, we would have to save up for months. Terry has always been good at keeping our money on track.
P: Biggest pet peeves?
T: Grace loves to have the last word!
G: And he jumps to conclusions!
P: You’ve been together over 60 years – what’s the secret?
T: You have to learn to give and take. You know, Grace has got a lot of interests I haven’t got and I do things she doesn’t enjoy doing. But we always meet in the middle and make sure we do things together.
P: So, what are some of the things you do together?
G: We enjoy going on holidays together, going out for meals and seeing our friends.
P: What’s the best advice on love you’ve ever been given?
G: I don’t think I’ve ever been given any advice on love. You just make it up as you go along. Perhaps that’s the easiest way to learn.
T: There are lots of things I like about her. We’ve had our ups and downs like all families do but we’ve done the best we could with what we had. Back in the day, money was a lot tighter and Grace was good at being clever – making clothes for the kids. That’s something I really admire.
P: Nan, how about your favourite things about Grandad?
G: If we wanted to buy something back then, we would have to save up for months. Terry has always been good at keeping our money on track.
P: Biggest pet peeves?
T: Grace loves to have the last word!
G: And he jumps to conclusions!
P: You’ve been together over 60 years – what’s the secret?
T: You have to learn to give and take. You know, Grace has got a lot of interests I haven’t got and I do things she doesn’t enjoy doing. But we always meet in the middle and make sure we do things together.
P: So, what are some of the things you do together?
G: We enjoy going on holidays together, going out for meals and seeing our friends.
P: What’s the best advice on love you’ve ever been given?
G: I don’t think I’ve ever been given any advice on love. You just make it up as you go along. Perhaps that’s the easiest way to learn.
P: The modern dating scene is dominated by apps – what was it like when you got together?
G: Well, there was no such thing as mobile phones, if you were going to see each other at a certain place and a certain time, you had to be there.
T: There weren’t many landlines either at that point so if you wanted to call your other half you’d have to go up to the phone box. You’d often see people queuing outside a phone box just waiting for it to ring. It’s so much easier now.
P: We have a big family. What have been the rewards and challenges around raising a family together?
G: It’s been very hard at times. One of the biggest challenges was finding enough money to keep our children happy. I didn’t work because I looked after them – nurseries didn’t really exist back then – so you had to do it all yourself. Having just one person with an income really wasn’t enough to keep you afloat.
T: While Grace was looking after the children, I had two or three jobs at times. I did a bit of gardening for people here, some fencing and odd jobs there.
G: Having children was our greatest reward. Grandad wasn’t so keen on that idea at first (laughs).
T: We had seven years of married life before we had children, which made a difference.
G: Well, a mum spends all her time with the children, so it’s natural sometimes for the man to feel like he’s being pushed out sometimes.
P: How do you think the roles have changed now for women?
G: It’s definitely moving in the right direction in terms of equality.
T: I was very involved at my place of work in 1963 in protesting for fair pay for women. I went on marches and striked as much as I could. At the time, women only earned half of what men did and to be honest, they worked even harder.
G: Now women have equal pay it’s a different kind of battle. They don’t have enough time to spend with their families. I looked after my grandchildren, including you Paige, and I really loved that. I missed it so much when you all decided to grow up. I have fond memories of singing in the car with you all, climbing trees. I was really happy.
G: Well, there was no such thing as mobile phones, if you were going to see each other at a certain place and a certain time, you had to be there.
T: There weren’t many landlines either at that point so if you wanted to call your other half you’d have to go up to the phone box. You’d often see people queuing outside a phone box just waiting for it to ring. It’s so much easier now.
P: We have a big family. What have been the rewards and challenges around raising a family together?
G: It’s been very hard at times. One of the biggest challenges was finding enough money to keep our children happy. I didn’t work because I looked after them – nurseries didn’t really exist back then – so you had to do it all yourself. Having just one person with an income really wasn’t enough to keep you afloat.
T: While Grace was looking after the children, I had two or three jobs at times. I did a bit of gardening for people here, some fencing and odd jobs there.
G: Having children was our greatest reward. Grandad wasn’t so keen on that idea at first (laughs).
T: We had seven years of married life before we had children, which made a difference.
G: Well, a mum spends all her time with the children, so it’s natural sometimes for the man to feel like he’s being pushed out sometimes.
P: How do you think the roles have changed now for women?
G: It’s definitely moving in the right direction in terms of equality.
T: I was very involved at my place of work in 1963 in protesting for fair pay for women. I went on marches and striked as much as I could. At the time, women only earned half of what men did and to be honest, they worked even harder.
G: Now women have equal pay it’s a different kind of battle. They don’t have enough time to spend with their families. I looked after my grandchildren, including you Paige, and I really loved that. I missed it so much when you all decided to grow up. I have fond memories of singing in the car with you all, climbing trees. I was really happy.
P: What do you think has been your biggest achievement as a couple?
G: I would have to say our family. Having the children and the grandchildren, especially Paige (laughs). We’re so proud of what everybody has done and achieved.
P: People are going to think I paid you to say that…
P: If you were only allowed to give me one piece of advice, what would it be?
G: Just do what you think is right. Follow your heart. Find someone that you can have a partnership with. Good communication. Someone sensible. A lot of money would help.
T: Relationships thrive when you work hard at them. If it becomes too easy, you don’t want it. Now people have a row and they’re off. They give up. Sometimes you have to find a way around your problems. A lot of people want it all to start with. The perfect relationship, the perfect wedding, but it’s never a quick fix.
P: How will you be spending Valentine’s Day?
G: We don’t really do Valentine’s Day. Grandad has never really bought me flowers, so why kick a habit now.
T: We will probably spend it in front of the TV watching BBC news with a plate of pork chops for dinner, exactly what we would be doing any other day. Maybe that’s what makes it special – we’re living all our little traditions that make us, us.
G: I would have to say our family. Having the children and the grandchildren, especially Paige (laughs). We’re so proud of what everybody has done and achieved.
P: People are going to think I paid you to say that…
P: If you were only allowed to give me one piece of advice, what would it be?
G: Just do what you think is right. Follow your heart. Find someone that you can have a partnership with. Good communication. Someone sensible. A lot of money would help.
T: Relationships thrive when you work hard at them. If it becomes too easy, you don’t want it. Now people have a row and they’re off. They give up. Sometimes you have to find a way around your problems. A lot of people want it all to start with. The perfect relationship, the perfect wedding, but it’s never a quick fix.
P: How will you be spending Valentine’s Day?
G: We don’t really do Valentine’s Day. Grandad has never really bought me flowers, so why kick a habit now.
T: We will probably spend it in front of the TV watching BBC news with a plate of pork chops for dinner, exactly what we would be doing any other day. Maybe that’s what makes it special – we’re living all our little traditions that make us, us.